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I just don't know what is happening anymore .. I just don't know who I am. I broke up with him.. which didn't make me sad. I mean losing him wasn't a big deal for me. I just feel pitty for him cause he keep asking me to give him another chance ! I don't want to .. OMG ! I think I have some feelings for Mahan ! But he is his friend. Of course he is Sara's friend more than Ali's. whatever .. I don't think this ever happens. I just shipped him with Mozhan ! I was hopeful nothing happens :) that's totally embaracing! Yesterday we went to cafe ! I told Mozhan to pay attention to him. He came later. The whole time I was looking at the door. Then he came , and sat beside me. We chat ! And I underst 105...ادامه مطلب

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I don't know what I'm doing anymore. It's his birthday .. why i can't forget him ?! :) I feel like I have no feelings for a anymore ! Sara asked me if i'm intrested in being with Mahan :)) His cute .. and kind .. but his friend with a :)) Actually I like it .. but .. idk :)

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Today I bought a French self-studying book. I wanna start it now. mom says I have to go to classes too. anyway I think it's good to know sth about that before going to the class or taking the course at university. I have to work on my writing and grammar too. GOD ! I need to improve ! :(

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A guy replyed to my ads at penfriends club. He's turkish ! come on ! He's not a native speaker , how can I be sure that he write correctly ! But it's better than nothing .. I havn't studies for few days. All i did was watching GOT ! i just started it and found out what i was missing ! I have watched 3 seasons and i'm going to start forth one after finishing that. I can't do anything but watching i 105...ادامه مطلب

The air around me feels like a cage :) ! It really does ... my best years are wasting. alone. with no friends. Sometimes I think I want to marry him as soon as possible just to release myself. I know that's a bad idea. I know what comes after these kind of choices , more problems ! But I just don't know what to do anymore. I'm alone. I'm really really alone. I need someone. A girl. A friend. A clo 105...ادامه مطلب

Post number 100 ! amazing .. I hadn't continue writing a web for this long before started this. Started this to write about him and know .. ! I afraid to go back and read what I wrote. I don't want to remeber that I was a fool. I still think that I am. I'm always worried about saying sth and sounds foolish. I'm always worried about peoples judgments .. I know .. I'll never can enjoy my life this w 105...ادامه مطلب

I think I'm getting better. Maybe for none_stop watching got ! 3 more episodes left. I may finish it tonight. I was thinking that I lost 4 kgs in a month. can I do it till the next month too ?! If I can .. then I'll be 53 .. and 2 more kgs till the end of summer .. sounds really good ! I was at this weight before so there is no such a bold difference. But 51 ?! never ! I'll be in a good shape finally .. 

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I broke up with him. Last night. I don't know why really .. that's funny ! I guess I'm losing my mind ! I cant't tolerate his atitudes anymore .. He drives me crazy all the time. He wants to argue about all the little worthless things in our relationship and srsly ! I can't handle them ! last night he was just talking and talking and it had been 2 days that I was bored and instead of understanding me he was just bothering me with his bitter words. I tried to anwer ! I tried to be cruel and bitter as well but suddenly I started to cry really hard. He couldn't see that bc we were texting but I was crying .. the I felt I can't do it anymore. I said to him that I hate him and I don't want to hear a word from him anymore .. I'm sad just bc I didn't want to break his hard .. but I can't ! I really can't ! I can't discribe my feelings by words .. 

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